What Summer Can Teach Us About Healing

Just as each season invites a shift, summer offers a unique kind of growth; it welcomes us to soften and embrace space. Maybe summer brings slower morning coffees, giving you permission to indulge, or allows you time to be fully present with loved ones and savor connections. Summer might allow you to soak in more sunshine and feel the breeze during a daily walk. Summer often reminds me to connect with the small moments of joy, which can bring some discomfort as it pulls me away from productivity and the hustle of daily life. I am also still learning to embrace a sense of slowness and being.

Summer gives us space to adjust to a new rhythm, and clear out some of the mental clutter that we have been carrying. And yet, in that change summer can feel chaotic too, full of conflicting desires for rest, connection, play, and productivity.  You might be wondering why it can feel so hard to slow-down. The human nervous system is wired for safety and is designed to respond effectively to stress and danger, which is why it can get stuck in high alert. When this is the body's familiar state, then rest can feel uncomfortable, because the nervous system is not used to functioning in this new rhythm yet.

A life full of mental stimulation becomes the new ‘normal’, and when there is abrupt silence or space again the brain searches for stimulation where comfort lies. In an attempt to provide protection, the nervous system continues to scan the environment for potential threats which can look like:

• Feeling guilt for rest, and negative internal self-talk that reinforces the cycle of guilt

• Anxious thoughts, or feeling restless when trying to sit still (physical discomfort)

• Social pressure in response to saying no, when you are needing time for you

• Fears with slowing down, such as feeling like you are falling behind or missing something because you are not being productive 

WHAT OUR BODY IS TELLING US

The nervous system sends us cues, and is about tuning in and getting curious about what the messages from your body are trying to tell you. Beyond our biology there is also the learned narrative that each of us holds internally a story that often equates worth to level of worth with how much we do and achieve. From a young age, many of us are taught to hustle and be productive. This learned conditioning can amplify the nervous system’s discomfort with rest resulting in feelings of guilt, or a negative self-talk such as labeling slowing down as wrong or lazy. Recognizing this without judgement is important, because it allows us to question and gently challenge this integrated belief. You can also slowly reframe your internal narrative in a way that aligns for you, such as rest is productive, or rest is an act of radical self-care. What if you start to view slowing down as an essential part of healing and growth?

INTERNAL EXPECTATIONS

For many, the transition into summer stirs up something tender; the longing for mental, emotional, and physical rejuvenation, paired with the challenge of softening into it and allowing it to happen. When we have been living in a space of overdrive and overfunctioning, dropping into ease is not always a simple task. The pace of doing and achieving often feels more comfortable than simply being. I look at this time as nervous system re-calibration which takes time, and is a slow and tender process. It can help to acknowledge the discomfort that this brings, providing a sense of internal validation and acceptance of how this inner discrepancy feels. Sometimes we just need to welcome rest in small doses, just enough to experience it in a way that feels safe and nourishing. These moments can be small changes, subtle shifts that signal to your nervous system that it is safe to slow-down.

Here are some examples of how this can look combining mindfulness, movement and intention-setting to support in slowing down:

1. Turning off your phone for your morning coffee or tea, allows you to start the day without distractions

2. Set an intention for the day, even just one word. For example, “today I choose connection”

3. Taking 5 deep breaths repeatedly throughout the day, helps you regulate

4. Looking around you during a walk, fully take in your surroundings supports you in being fully present 

5. Closing your eyes for a few minutes and allowing yourself to be without sensory input

6. Having a sip of water

7. Slowing down a personal hygiene task like brushing your teeth, or having a shower. 

8. Resting for a few minutes without any pressure to do anything 

9. If your mind wanders, thank it for doing its job and gently bring your attention back to your senses 

FINDING YOUR PACE

The slower rhythm, and even the challenge of adjusting to the lack of routine can welcome a sense of softening. The slow pace allows space to explore what is underneath the noise. This season naturally encourages us to slow down, and to become present with our bodies and minds, but if you have been living with chronic stress, or emotional overwhelm for months or even years, then this shift might feel uncomfortable. You might find yourself overthinking, or over-analyzing feelings. Recognizing that the nervous system needs time, and gentle invitations to move from alertness to calm can be the first step in facilitating this personal shift. These intentional pauses allow self-nourishment and for healing to happen. This can be the perfect opportunity to process past trauma experiences, or even take time to celebrate your growth.

Summer can also offer the opportunity to reconnect with yourself, and plant seeds and new intentions for your personal goals and how you want to evolve.The process of intention setting can help you align with your deeper values, hopes, and dreams offering you an internal compass to help you navigate your life and here are some simple ways for you to start. Summer can offer a sense of exploration to meet yourself as you are, whether you are in-between or having a hard time slowing down.

Maybe you’re feeling disconnected from yourself or others, the yearning for more presence in your life, therapy can be a safe space to explore whatever is coming up for you during this season and next!

Stephanie